If I was Caligula...I would go into hospitality and kill Stone Phillips

If I was Caligula....I would buy all the Holiday Inns and call them Caligula Inn. I would install vomitoriums which would later be featured on Dateline for their uncleanliness. Then I would Have Stone Phillips executed by tiger at an Imperial Feast. No mere plebeian inspects Caligula with a blacklight!