Wednesday, May 28, 2008

If I was Caligula...I would have the finest breakfast

I would order my steward to prepare a breakfast feast of no less than a thousand Dunkin' Donuts toasted hash browns, served on golden platters by young Greek slave boys. A perfect sculpture of mighty Athena would pour the elixir of the gods, hazelnut iced coffee, light with 2 sugars, from her bosom. The finest lox platter from Zabars would served alongside thundering African warriors with assorted bagels upon their tribal spears.

Do not doubt that Caligula would provide a waffle station! There will be two waffle stations and a man cutting slices of freshly captured boar that I myself slayed in the Imperial hunt.

Incitatus, my mighty steed, consul, and priest, shall be watered with mimosas from the Imperial goblet. Finally, I shall have the guards rain a shower of bacon to the citizens from the backs of elephants.

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